Mastering Dating with Yoda - Progressive Dating (Part 1)

Women think differently from men, if you have not already realized. Thus when it comes to dating, they expect things to progress from date number one onwards.

Men, on the other hand, think that they must come out with all guns blazing on the first date. What they fail to realize is that they have to outdo themselves the next date.

This means that if you brought her to some posh restaurant on your first date, its going to be very hard to outdo that. Yes, I have mentioned that such things matter not when she likes you; but unless you have super sensitivity, you are not going to realize this on date number 2, which incidentally is her confirmation date wherein she decides whether you "can or not".

Confirmation date…?
What on earth is a confirmation date? This is the time which she confirms a couple of things. Whether she would like to see you naked, whether you like her, whether she likes you or whether she is going to make use of you, and whether you are going to let her make use of you.

Yes, I have said that women decide whether you are lover or friend material within 3 seconds of the first meeting, but women being women will always want to confirm things, especially so if she is the type who plays by the rules.

Thus what you guys should be doing is to keep things simple, so that the next time you are able to surpass your initial effort. The same rule applies to gift giving. In fact, one of my dear friends does not believe in giving gifts until he has seen the girl naked…not that I recommend it.

Generally, Yoda gives gifts not, until the girl has made the first move by giving him something. This is termed in social psychology as the norm of reciprocity. Yes, some will argue that men should make the first move; however, with the state of women (again generally speaking) being who they are, I prefer to err on the side of safety.

Investment theory…
The investment theory of relationship states that every party brings something to it and puts it into the relationship, called investments. These investments may be in the form of deeds done, money, time, etc. The more you have invested, the harder it is for you to leave the relationship.

Karl Marx states that money is an expression of ourselves, i.e. we labor to produce goods which are then sold for money and then come to us as salary. This labor may also be in the form of your expertise, etc. Therefore, when we invest money into a relationship (not to mention our time and emotions), we are actually investing ourselves into it.

This is all fine and good if the girl is of pure motive and not up to any hanky panky. But if she decides to pull a stunt and you have invested loads into this relationship, guess where you are headed?

Which is easier in a casino (haha, IR!): to lose $500 and then leave, or to lose $500,000 and your cheap polyester pants, and then leave? It's fairly obvious, isn't it, unless you are Bill Gates. That being the case, you may donate $500,000 to me as well.

Yummy Valiums…
The very thing I described happened to my friend, and for two years after the girl (who was not his girlfriend) told him to buzz off (after she found a better guy), he spiraled downward into a state of depression. After many Valiums and psychiatric help, he did manage to recover.

Did he learn from the experience? NO WAY. Today, he is still persisting with his sick belief that got him to the psychiatrist's couch. Practice makes permanent. So if you have an affinity for depression tabs, please go right ahead and do what he did.

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~Yoda
Helping you to unravel the mysteries of love